A Big Hole Of A Day
June 15, 2008, 5:10 pm
Filed under: Family, LOVE, Personal | Tags: , , ,

Where can I begin? This is a question that one should probably never start a blog with but it’s kind of how I feel right now in the moment. Today is, of course, Father’s Day. I really try not to think on things that pull me down too much in an emotional state, but for me this day has that effect. It’s because on this day as much as I would love to celebrate my dad and love on him I can’t, because he is not here.

I know people will probably think or say you should think about what a great dad you had and celebrate him that way. Yes, I would definitely agree with you that I had an unbelievable loving, caring, compassionate, Godly man in my dad. Yes, I should thank God for giving me such a great father here on this earth for the time I had him. And many, many times during the year or even daily when there is no reason at all, I do thank God and look back fondly on the memories of dad. But, today I really can’t celebrate because the person that this day is for is not here. It’s a huge hole of a day for me.

If you are a child of a parent that has gone on to heaven you really can relate and know what I am feeling. Because Father’s Day or Mother’s Day isn’t really a day for Fathers and Mothers it’s a day for the children of Fathers and Mothers. It’s a day when kids can kick back with their dads and say stuff like, “thank you Pops for being my Dad” or “I love you dad” or “I hope you enjoy today father, we are going to Longhorn in honor of you!” Those are but a few phrases that I will never again get to say because my dad is no longer here. The opportunity has passed for me.

It is something that everyone, eventually will have to deal with. It’s part of a circle of life and I know I’m not alone but days like today really hurt my heart. So if your dad is still alive take at least a little time with him and cherish each conversation, each meal, each interaction because all too soon the opportunity is gone, never to be recaptured again.

All I have now are pictures and memories. So Father’s Day is a big ole’ hole of a day for me. What I would give for one more hug, one more smile, one more time of seeing him work on a car or raise his hands in worship to God. What I would give for just one more moment with my dad. So I’ll just say it too my heart because that’s the only place where dad still exists on this earth, Happy Father’s Day, Thanks for being my dad, I love ya daddy.

Love on him while he’s still here because those moments will get you through the days when there is nothing but a big hole because he can’t be with you. Thank God that death can’t take away my memories and heaven has dad until one day I’ll see him again. That day will truly be a Father’s day in more ways than one and Father’s day will no longer be a hole for me.


3 Comments so far
Leave a comment

Well said!

I do not understand like you and Bryan do … but my heart goes out to the both you!

Comment by ginazugelder

My thoughts are with you. I lost my dad this year and yesterday was a difficult day.

Comment by should i say?

Thanks for saying what so many of us are feeling. I think losing a parent is one of the hardest things I will ever go through. You miss them everyday in the little things in your daily life but on holidays it is so much harder.

Comment by Jennie

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